Wednesday, September 26, 2007

Because you demanded it!

Well, okay. Nobody demanded anything. One person asked nicely. I thought I’d show the humble beginnings of the Demolisher, the chowderhead I drew a couple of posts back. These are the comics I drew when I was seven. I think I was a little older when I drew the SKULL book. Not that the art improved much. (Though Mike did do the layout and lettering for the splash page for me.)

Demolisher #1

In this issue, we’re introduced to a Professor Brown who discovers a “cemicle” that will “win the war!” He’s gloating over this fact when his lab assistant (who is either Emannuel Lewis or standing in hole) clumsily bumps into him, causing him to drop his beaker, which explodes. Then the little coward runs off. Can’t get good help these days. When Brown wakes up, he discovers he has unspecified superpowers and so he naturally sews up a purty costume and starts swinging through the city on a rope. The audacity! Such flamboyant activity doesn’t go unnoticed and the Demolisher soon finds himself attacked (for no apparent reason) by the deadly Disruptor!

Demolisher #2

Now that we’re past that pesky set up business, we can get to the real action. This is an issue-long fight scene between the Demolisher and the Disruptor that ends, predictably, with a final-page cliffhanger and the sudden appearance of the motiveless Slasher! He’s out for revenge for...uh...something. I was laughing at the cover to this issue for a couple of reasons. First, the Demolisher is running away! He hasn’t quite gotten the hang of the whole hero thing. Second, his logic is impeccable. Check out his four-star reasoning if you dare. Also, in an amazing coincidence, the second (and final) issue of the series is also the second-BEST issue.

Skull #1

Poor Skull. Not only is he suffering from the epidemic “uncanniness” plaguing the Wieringo superfolk, he’s fed up with the superhero biz already...and it’s only just the cover of his first issue! That didn’t take long. He also never got an origin story. Not even the ever-present “lab accident.” He must have taken matters into his own hands and gone out and stolen the Punisher’s costume. Out of embarrassment, he added the full-face mask. In his premiere issue, Skull is attacked (in his civilian identity) by a mugger. Skull manages to quickly switch into his costume unseen (“Gimme just a minute...be right with you...”) and retaliate. Unfortunately, the mugger has a supervillain sidekick, the vile Criminal! Skull quickly dispatches the Criminal (by tossing him over his head) and accidentally kills the mugger with his wrist-mounted blaster (which he seems to have stolen from Marvel’s Firebrand character.) While running from the police, Skull ducks into an alley to take care of some urgent business, scratching out the word “crime fighter” on his superhero I.D. card. Reward posters are promptly posted. Then (I smell cliffhanger!) he’s attacked by the mysterious Tarantula-Man who’s wearing a reversed-color version of Spider-Man’s webbed togs. I can hear my clever thoughts now...”Heh heh heh...I’ll just switch the red and blue and nobody will ever know.”

It was fun reading through these books but it was enlightening to see how much more derivative and simplistic they were than I remembered. Jeez, we took ourselves so seriously when we were kids, didn’t we?

14 comments:

Heywood Jablomie said...

Haha great stuff Matt! Thanks for sharing it. This has been a fun set of blogs here I gotta say. I think every one of us has had characters and thoughts just like these growing up. I wish I still had a lot of stuff from my early days, it sure would be funny to look at it now. I have some stuff but nothing from when I was a little bratty kid. I say keep this momentum going for a little longer, this is great stuff!

todd said...

matt~


laughed so hard i cried!
really!
teh second (best) issue of the domolisher did it! omigod! "he said human so he is not human!"
killed me! KILLED ME!!!
i'm still chuckling...
'course, i say this with all the admiration and envy of someone who could never get past the first page of the comics i did as a kid.
you guys were awesome!

but, really...that line destroyed me...
or should i say domolished me...?

todd

Christian D. Leaf said...

Hahahaha. The Skull's chestplate looks like a happy Stormtrooper or a skull from a Peace Frog. I also like how he can scratch unnecessary words off of his ID. I'm gonna try that with "organ donor" on my license.

"The battle" in a starburst is all you really need on a cover to guarantee instant readership. That's the truth. Look it up.

Kinda glad all my old stuff is in a closet somewhere in my parents home. Otherwise I might be tempted to post them.

Adam Hutch said...

Matt, those are great! I think all second issues should be labeled "Second Best Issue Ever."

They might be derivative and simplistic, but the fact that seven year-old Mafus was inspired to sit down and try to create a comic of his own just goes to show you how great (and under utilized) a tool comics are for encouraging kids' creativity.

Lemonstock01 said...

i love them they're great! you just made this terrible Wednesday a whole lot better!

Anonymous said...

Matt-
What Todd said goes double for me, I'm still wiping my eyes. Even reading the comments is cracking me up. Now Leaf is going to scratch stuff off his license AND he referred to the Skull's chestplate as a happy Stormtrooper. You guys are nuts.

renecarol said...

Those are great! You were a talented little 7 year old.

Matt Wieringo said...

Emilio, if you think Leaf is funny here, you should try riding in a car with him for 2-and-a-half hours. Hilarious!

Warren said...

I love this stuff! This is why every kid should have at least a small stack of (age-appropriate) comic books! And, yeah, I laughed out loud when I read that line.

Chris Gardner said...

Hot Damn! I've been wracking my brain for months as to what the Halloween costumes'll be this year. My son will be... THE DOMOLISHER!, although at 17 months old the only things he'll be domolishing will be club crackers and pampers. The wife with a mohawk and roller skates might be kinda nice...

Matt Wieringo said...

Chris, if you do that, I WANT PICTURES!! I think that would make my life complete. Seriously.

Unknown said...

Hahaha! These are awesome, Matt, AWESOME!!! You know, you really can't argue with that kind of logic.

If you have more of the pages, you just gotta post them... because WE DEMANDED IT!!!

--Rich

Brian said...

Matt,

The "Great New Issue, Great New Origin" line on the cover of the first issue ever of the character's book made me laugh out loud.

I also really like that it is a Noble Comics Group production. Where on earth did your seven year old mind get the idea of being a "Group." Brilliant.

Matt Wieringo said...

That was back in the good ol' days when Marvel had "Marvel Comics Group" in that bar running across the top of all their covers. I just copied it. I was seriously depressed the month they did away with those. It was like I'd lost part of my childhood.